Ah Lians Lian, Ah Bengs Beng, Lala’s and aLtErNaTiNg cApItAlS

Posted November 20, 2004 at 12:59 pm in Ranting

*sigh* what a sad state of affairs..

Just wanted to mumble a bit about the amount of Ahlians and Ahbengs around now, for those of you not native to these shores..how to explain..

An Ahbeng would be a stereotyped Singaporean/Malaysian male who speaks local slangs (Hokkien or Cantonese mixed with English and Malay) and likes to be noticed by wearing trendy (read ugly) fashion items, ie, tight outfits of luminous colour (Prominent brands like Versace, Moschino etc), coloured/dyed/bleached (Known as Golden Monkey hair) hair and accessories such as handphones, necklaces, all of which are conspicusously displayed. Shirts with dragons on are the thing, and tatoos too, lots of tatoos, usually also dragons. They usually drive normal cars such as a Wira 1.3 with an Evo III full bodykit, alloy spoiler, racing rims, 5″ barbeque set exhaust and super loud techno playing stereo with flashing lights. (You can see such cars at The Rice Boy Page[/url]). Full Fast & Furious style with neon lights under the car.

They love to listen to Techno music (known as feng tau, literally translated means ‘shake head’) and dance badly.

Typical Ahbeng car. Typical Ahbeng look.

More info can be found here: https://members.tripod.com/~kunkun/ahbeng2.htm

The oldest standing Ahbeng and Ahlian page hehe.

You can also check out the witty commentary at https://www.ahbeng.com/[/url]

There is also a Hong Kong variation commonly known as ‘Gu Wak Jai’ something like those guys from the Young And Dangerous[/url] movie series.

Most Ahbengs are emulating these guys (Ekin Chen, Jordan Cham etc).

Many are real gangsters, or wanna-be’s mostly involved in some part with some kind of Triad gang like their gu wak jai idols.

The Ahlian would be the female version, something like the asian version of a Bimbo. Baby G watch, in pink, again lots of branded stuff like Ferragamo headbands or belts, Versace, Gucci, LV etc..Mostly fake but the label must still be prominently displayed along with the latest handphone with pink cover. Huge platform shoes are a requirement and blonde/red/blue streaks in the hair, the aim is to look like one of the gorgeous Hong Kong pop chicks..but it rarely works.

Typical AhLian look.

They also both like to swear a huge amount with such gems as ‘Diu lei mou chao hai!’ ‘Ni na ma’ ‘Diu nia seng’ and ‘Ka ni na!’ The favourite alltimer I think is ‘Chao cibai’ shouted/screamed like CHOOOOOOOOWWWWW CHEEEEEEEE BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIII

If you enter any cybercafe you will see some bengs too playing counterstrike, howling like monkeys with the speakers on full blast..the Ahlians will be sitting around playing 02Jam and giggling.

Ok what brought this on…some classic gem I saw on one of the ‘community sites’..

Check this out:

I LIke TO WatcH The AcTioN MOvIe Such As 2fUsT2fURiOS…HErM..C.S.I iS AlSO tHE mOST i lIKe TO wATCH…gHOST bLOcKbUSTER..aLsOaLSo…hMM…aND AlL pROgRAM AT mtV,[V] AnD hITz.tV..

I mean wtf? Excuse me? This is like fulfilling all of the above stereotypes..and this isn’t a one off, if you browse friendster you will find hundreds of profiles filled with crap like this..

She also said…

I lovE MusiX Very WeLL And No bOdy caN stop Me to Love It…eSpeciaLLy EngLish SOng…I AlSo Like tO BikE My SouLMate SkuTEr

Seriously..wtf?

What’s with the whole alternate capitalisation thing? I really, really, REALLY can’t stand that.

People please get your own identity..

If you go to any of the clubs in KL, you will see plenty of Ahbengs and Ahlians, enjoy the experience.

There are also SPG’s which I will perhaps explain another day..

If I offended anyone I know..sorry, but you are an Ahbeng and you know it 😛 Fortunately most the people I know have grown up and are no longer in that stage (even me, I have retired most of my dragon shirts).

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18 Responses to Ah Lians Lian, Ah Bengs Beng, Lala’s and aLtErNaTiNg cApItAlS

  1. kimberlycun November 20, 2004 at 1:05 pm #

    those shoes the girls have on look eerily familiar 😛

    thumbs up for ah beng photo….precisely depicted and he has that indisputable ah beng hairstyle – centreparting lol

  2. TheGreatFaggot November 20, 2004 at 4:59 pm #

    arent you an ah beng too G? the descriptions fits you…no? cars …clothes 😡

  3. Vader November 20, 2004 at 8:02 pm #

    eh Ah Bengs now have spiked hair wei 😛

    i wonder how painful it wuld be if those shoes were to hit my schlong teheheheeee.

  4. retired thai boxing girl November 21, 2004 at 2:50 am #

    i think it really takes a lot of time and effort for them to come out with how they are looking now, should give them some credits, not for originality, but the efforts put in.
    I think it would be interesting to see an ah-lian thai boxing girl, no??

  5. ShaolinTiger November 21, 2004 at 5:19 am #

    I am president of the whiteboy Ahbeng club 😀

    I am partially retired tho…clothes not so much any more, car still yes 😛

  6. ShaolinTiger November 21, 2004 at 5:21 am #

    Yeah I did think of it , but forgot to mention the ahbeng evolution, now it’s spiky hair ala blonde streaks or long F4 style..

    Pain for ballkicking should be proportionally less, because the space between the foot and your balls would be less, so less range for acceleration..or something 😀

  7. FireAngel November 21, 2004 at 6:46 pm #

    eh, but I thought u were a damn proud ah beng yourself?

  8. oliviasy November 21, 2004 at 7:49 pm #

    ferragamo also known as “fei-lat-kai-mou”. literal translation means fly-out-chicken-feather

  9. narrowband October 20, 2005 at 2:23 am #

    The clubs are all full of em. It’s a must for Ah Bengs and Lians!

  10. wiLdiv3z August 3, 2006 at 5:24 am #

    haha.ah liens and ah bengs.. makes me think of home but like you said..alternating capitals..that is just so wrong..and if you can’t speak english properly please don’t blog. :p nevertheless, ah bengs and ah liens keep me entertained when i’m at home.. i have confess to ‘feng tau-ing’ myself once in awhile.. haha.. i can’t wait to go home..

  11. gazard October 23, 2006 at 11:29 am #

    hahaha, can’t stop laughing, those AlTernaTe cApiTaliSatiOn things are really make me crazy. I agree with you man!

  12. hint October 30, 2006 at 9:57 pm #

    this is interesting i would say. cant quite agree with some of your comments. i believe this is what we call culture shock and those mentioned by you is one of the subculture in some asean country. i grew up in this very same culture and i am against it since very young but when you put yourself into their shoe, the whole picture would be clearer. it is quite hard to describe here due to my language proficiency. i believe the culture is diminishing as the whole society education system was uplifted compared to the old days. young and dangerous is a great movie if you know its hidden value. mayb its effect is too overwhelming causing the youngster to mimic what they saw.

  13. V March 3, 2007 at 1:59 am #

    Totally agree….AlT CaPiTaLs Is SoSo PoPuLaR ArOuND…and it cause me short-term blind after looking at those capital….

  14. Emily January 28, 2008 at 7:26 pm #

    People choose to be lian or beng ‘cus they think it’s cool.

    And i find it dumb that the people over here call it Lala than beng or lian like in SG.

    We should stop the influence ‘cus it’s really dumb 😀

    All those wannabes are like ‘UGH’.
    Boasting abt bitch-slaps and arguments they have.

    How to stop this retarded behavior?!

  15. Vincent October 12, 2008 at 6:54 am #

    The Clubs Re Full of em….
    Ah Beng Kia…they love to fight
    they dunno they re ah beng kia…haha
    they just thought they re cool…

  16. gyeo October 15, 2012 at 11:57 pm #

    wikipedia brought me here… love your post!!! 😉

 
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